On August 2, 2012 the next best news I’ve heard during my father’s 13-day confinement: McDonald’s Twister Fries are back!
The timing of its grand comeback cannot be more impeccable; as though it was was waiting in the wings of typhoon Gener. Waited for it to abate and with the flamboyance of a gay diva, went center stage, parted the curtains with drama; head thrown back and arms wide open, enticing the audience to look and drool at the presence of The Queen of the Fries.
It must have been a lucky day to be in the presence of such greatness and be granted this interview.
Me: Finally, you’re back! We miss you!
Queen: Oh, dahlin’! That’s sweet!
Me: Para kang buni, nawawala… bumabalik.
Queen: OMGeeeah! You’re so kadiri to make me halintulad to that disease. Ganun lang talaga ako. I don’t make myself available to everyone all the time. See how it works? Hinahanap-hanap niyo ako 😉
Me: Gagah! Pa-importante ka din talaga eh noh!
Queen: Well, I’m not The Queen for no reason, right?
Me: So feeling Queen Elizabeth lang ang peg mo? Hello! Wala ka sa England noh!
Queen: Why not?! I’m the queen of my potato turf. Nakakalimutan niyo yung friendly bubuyog diyan sa tabi-tabi (raising eyebrow) pag andito beauty ko. And even those potatoes lurking in the corners that entice you with different flavors, superdedmadela niyo because of my queenly presence.
Me: Dami mong alam! But honestly, what is up with their vanilla flavor huh?
Queen: I know, right! It’s painful to see that flavor drown into oblivion.
Me: So, until when are you going to indulge us with your presence?
Queen: Well, as my kingdom said, Prioritize your Twister Fries. I might be gone in less than two weeks. Until Aug. 25 to be exact. This interview is really tiring na ha! Are we done yet?
Me: You are such a diva! Last question. How do you feel when a mere french fry gets mixed with your kind?
Queen: What a social climber. Really! Parang gustong mapasama sa mga alta de sociedad. But since I’ve a good heart, I let them make sabit so that some of my shashallness will rub off on them. And with that, adieu!
Me: Uma-attitude ka talaga ah! Anyway, thank you, Your Royal Fryness.